Oh joy, MORE twins to annoy me!
by Cupcake155
Summary: If Elrond thought it was hard dealing with one set of twins, he was gonna cop it big time. When the feanorians cause some problems with the valar, 2 girls get dropped into middle earth- except these ones are huge nerds.Funny nerds. Join the girls in drinking competitions, pranking Erestor,singing k-pop outside Elrond's door at yule and introducing spray on cheese to ME.Poor Elrond!
1. Prologue: What does the fox say?

**Disclaimer**

**Glorfindel:Cupcake155 owns NOTHING. Yes that includes me...**

**Cupcake: *pouting* I own a book with you in it, though...**

**Glorfindel: *Shudders* I would hate to see what would happens if you found out you owned me.**

**Cupcake: Let's find out, shall we?;) **

**Commence reading, crazy people  
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><p>Eru Iluvatar was sitting in his study, writing the future of the various worlds. However, he found it simply impossible to had had his coffee this morning, practiced dueling with Mandos (his son) before starting his work but even this peace of soul could not stop him from being so restless and annoyed. The reason for this however? Quite justifiable.<strong>(AN- does that word exist? I think so...)**

A voice kept popping up right behind his head, singing children songs. In sindarin, of course. The Valar teased him mercilessly after he explained these events,however when he sang the alphabet song on 10 hour repeat they agreed with him wholeheartedly. When he turned to look yet again, the singing ceased and no-one was there. For some reason he couldn't explain, he knew it was the blasted Feanorians. HOW they managed to get fragments of their souls out of Mandos he would never know. Perhaps they learned something or other when battling Morgoth. Also known as the eternal asshole.

Stupid Ñoldor kin slayers.

"What does the fox say?" Maglor this time. Eru sighed.

Great. Another problem to deal with. He had SPECIFICALLY told Mandos he could not play modern rock, korean pop or vocaloid in his halls. It would cause huge anachronisms. Not to mention the majority of the population would go insane, and if they found a way to escape from the void, would become serial killers. he didn't want serial killers in this parallel universe. The world was too perfect for that.

"Ao-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo!"

Turn. No one there. Gah.

Eru went back to his work, heeding the advice Nienna had given him earlier._"just ignore them, ada. It will drive them more crazy. Then they can come to me for emotional couseling!" _She was a wonderful girl, Nienna, kind, heartfelt and practical, but sometimes Eru wondered if she was dropped on her head as a child.

Just as Eru was about to continue writing the history of the early 3rd age,another song started blasting at top volume from the irritating ñoldo's mouth. Huh. And he called Nienna annoying. Was his voice naturally that pitchy? Or was he faking it? He was known as the singer, after all. Another change of song, again blaring very loudly. Or perhaps, more accurately, blurring.

"Blurred lines!"

he couldn't take it anymore.

"QUIT IT!" he shouted, turning around to a grinning Maglor.

:Hang on... he wasn't there before...:

Those were his last thoughts before the all-knowing god collapsed from the herbs which had spiked his coffee that morning.

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><p>Maglor leered again, and started fulfilling his duty. The reason he and his brothers had come here, ordered by their father.<p>

To cause trouble.

He grabbed the pen, and placed the two documents of the two worlds side by side, joining them with a long streak. He looked at the words that had been written on the Middle Earth paper- _the twins._

Well, this would certainly be interesting. He ran away to the void cackling, like the crazy man he was. Oh, this was not good. That was what made it so hilarious.

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><p>When the god came to, the first things he looked for was the two documents. When he saw what had happened to them, the creator almost choked.<p>

"Uh oh."


	2. Chapter 1: I'm an Ogre! Aargh!

**I'm so sorry I couldn't update sooner! I had to pack my bags and go to Greece for the holidays. The wifi in my grandmother's vineyard is terrible so I think I have a wonderful excuse. Thank you to my wonderful reviewers. But I checked the traffic graph, and 50 people read this without reviewing. Please man, review!**

**Note: I am planning on making this story an ongoing serial for quite a few years and would not be surprised if it goes over 100 chapters. You will also notice that every chapter has a pop culture reference.**

**Yes, I am aware that common and english are different languages but as I plan using many different languages in this story , to minimise confusion they will be the same.**

**Also, I would like a beta reader, so if anyone is offering to help, I appreciate it. English is my second language so I'm a little sloppy. However being fluent in Greek and having a grandmother who lives with us who is fluent in Hungarian really helps increase my inventory of curse words.**

**Anyway! Time for the disclaimer!**

**Glorfindel: Ugh... not again.**

**Cupcake: -_-**

**Glorfindel: Fine. But I'm doing it quickly! *deep breath* CupcakeownsnothingnoneofthecharacterslocationsornamesexceptforherOC'sastheseallbelongtothetolkienestatesoPLEASEDON'TSUETHE AUTHOR!**

**Cupcake: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!Good job! Now do it in Quenya.**

**Glorfindel: NO! *sulks off***

**Cupcake:Onwards to the promised land, readers!**

2 young ladies were celebrating their graduation from university.

A typical scenario, which many 24 year olds go through at least once in their lifetime and do it in typical ways.

Only thing is, nothing about these girls was typical.

"I call going to the bar and getting wasted!" their brother had shouted after he received his diploma of medicine, and ran off with his fianceé. He had left town 7 years ago to pursue his medical career with his wife and young son, leaving the girls alone with their half deaf mother. But that's another story altogether.

So, Emma and Emily were trying to get their jaded, old, VHS player to work (hey, uni students can't always afford their own DVD player!) and, having the wide imaginations that they did, being OH SO CREATIVE, they had resorted to quite drastic measures.

Emily was banging the VHS with a toy plushie hammer while Emma was praying to God, Jesus, Buddha, Allah, the Valar and Einstein that the VHS player would work. As the lid for the tape insertion opened and closed yet again, she crumpled to the floor cursing the world in multiple languages (A bachelor of linguistics and having a very mixed cultural background does help). Her twin stopped bashing the console inanely and glanced over to her sister.

"Uhh... I think we should change our strategy." She said to her slightly younger sister (11 minutes makes all the difference,as anyone who knows the twins well can tell you from experience.

"Ya think, dumbass? i would expect more from a lawyer. Honestly, you sound like an american sitcom!"replied Emma, groaning.

"Hey, don't know about you linguistics and business students, but everyone taking law and science had to sit through 6 hours of speeches wearing heavy-ass robes!In the middle of summer! With no air-conditioning! And they are black! See, these one's I'm wearing NOW! I look like I'm from star wars or assassin's creed!" The older twin retorted.

"Assassin's creed? You know I'm addicted to assassin's creed! Don't bring Altaïr into this! You're playing on my weaknesses so I will feel sorry for you and buy you chocolate! No, you look like an excorcist." She stopped to consider what she just said. "Hey, there's an idea! We can excorsise the VHS!" Emma smiled, brightening.

Emily sighed. "Fine. Now what fandom?"

Emma tapped her index finger to her chin, deep in thought. Her sister snorted. "you look constipated."

"Hush child. I'm thinking." the younger twin struck a pose, making Emily snort out loud. She grabbed her plushie hammer and smashed it over her sister's head, causing Emma to grab it and twist it around which resulted in a wrestling match.

"It's mine! Give it to me! Mine! My own! My very own! My preciousss!"Hissed Emily in a quite humorous Gollum impersonation. Emma pumped her fist as she finally came to a conclusion, causing her sister to fall over and the plushie to land in her lap, making her squeal.

" Lord of the Rings! We do lord of the rings!" Emma shouted, grabbing the old volume from the huge bookshelf sitting in their living room. Grinning, the girls prepared for something that they had on many different occasions.

" The Lord is with me. Blessed be the Lord Tolkien!" Now Emily took over.

"The power of tolkien compells you! The power of Tolkien compells you! I need a fangirl and a purist! The power of Tolkien compells you!"

Emma grinned, and the VHS began to work. The girls' faces lit up with glee, more so than a young child on christmas eve.

Then the room went light blue, and an ominous, evil laugh could be heard throughout the whole house. The twins eyes frantically searched the room looking for the source of the light. Which they never found, because that was when the room went black.

**T.A 2896**

Elrond and the Lords of Rivendell had been sitting in council when the two women fell out of the sky into the centre of the council room. Well, one fell, landed on her rear, felt the tips of her now pointy ears and got up muttering something about mary sues when an identical girl landed on her head screaming something that sounded like this:

" BLOODY HELL EMILY!YOU BROUGHT US INTO A FICTIONAL WORLD AND TURNED US INTO MOTHER****ING ELVES! BIACHI!" Followed by some colourful curses in Sindarin, Quenya, Greek and Hungarian. The 5 elves in the council room winced at the colourful language.

When the two landed on the floor again they were silent. Elladan stood up and prodded their shoulders with one finger, causing the girls to jump to their feet.

"Who are you?"

Of course right then Emma had to say the first retarded thing that popped into her head, with a scottish accent.

"I'm an OGRE! AARGH!"

Emily facepalmed.

"I'm with the idiot."


	3. Chapter 2: Worship the Python

Chapter 2: Worship the Python, it's very Monty

A/N:** Sorry for leaving you hanging my friends! Just finished finals (with all A's! Woohoo! Except P.E….) and becoming obsessed with Assassin's creed, so I was pretty pre-occupied. I have muses for pretty much 10 more chapters, just trying to organize them. Thanks for all the positive reviews! I'm going to try and update once a week, but now I have finals for music and extracurricular coaching soo….. read and Review! This chapter is rather short because of my workload. GOMEN!GOMEN!**

**Disclaimer:**

**Cupcake: Yeah, you caught me. I've been harbouring fictional characters in my room without my parents finding out. I am an amazing bullshit artist.**

**Erestor: You wish.**

**Cupcake: Hey! Do not underestimate my bullshitting capabilities! I managed to hide the existence of sugar from the kids I babysit for 4 years! And these kids were worse than 'Dan and 'Ro!**

**Erestor: * stunned* How—How much do you charge per hour?**

**Cupcake: None. This is a NON PROFIT STORY, so just IGNORE THIS AND READ ON!**

Of course, the girls had 'explained' their situation. Well, as the alcohol had just hit Emma, she ended up spewing nonsense in some form of mangled Japanese (A/N Perhaps she was attempting the Naruto splitting manoeuvre?) and tripping over

"Pray help me understand this, my Ladies." Sighed Lord Elrond. " Of course, hir-nin Elrond." (A/N Translation= My Lord)Emily replied promptly, passing a hand across her face at her sister's attempt of Monty Python.

" My sister and I were trying to get a… device to work. After attempting probably the most cliché and mediocre form of magic in existence, the machine started working and a bright light filled the room we were in. Perhaps it was the will of Iluvatar, but we do not know." The Ellons who had been listening to her short monologue now let Emma catch their attention with her charming snort.

" As IF Eru would care about us. We're just nerdy kids from a different world. Anyway, since when did you believe in Eru, Emily? Worship the Python, it's very Monty.". Everyone sighed as Emma continued walking in circles and hiccupping.

Perhaps she had been elected for her amazing perseverance, Emily reasoned to herself. Sometimes her sister could be extremely stupid.

" What puzzles me is the fact that you seem to know all about the past of this world when you come from a different one." Elrond remarked, and Emily opened her mouth to answer just as Emma chirped out " and the future!"

Everyone's mouths dropped open. Emily grabbed her briefcase ( She ALWAYS carried her briefcase, though the for this reason shall be explained later) and whacked her sister over the head, effectively concussing her.

Elladan winced, Elrohir gasped and Erestor raised an eyebrow. Glorfindel was too busy laughing at the sisters' antics when Emily's glare stopped him.

" Care to explain?" The Lords of Imladris asked in unison.

When Emma came to, a group of faces were peering intently at her.

It was just too bright! The illumination was unbeareable and she felt her head was about to explode. Glorfindel's blond hair wasn't exactly helping either.

She groaned, and sat up. " Glorfindel, stop competing with the sun! If you are going to shine, do it in front of someone who doesn't have a hangover."

The elves looked puzzled. They were wondering how she happened to know the Balrog slayer's name. When he voiced this question, the answer was simple:

" Blond mop. Could recognize it anywhere. Only 2 people in this world with shiny blond hair are you and Queen Elenwë. All the sindar have white hair." ( A/N – Non silmarillion readers, this is Turgon's wife, Turgon being the king of the Noldor in the time of Gondolin.)

The darker haired members of the room shook with outright contained laughter while the famous Vanya gaped.

" Did you just refer to my hair as a mop?"

" Yes. I have a hangover and a concussion so kindly leave me alone."

After Emily filled her in on her explanation of Tolkien's works, the fact that No, they did not want to go home and had told her that Lord Elrond was considering having the two girls working as Librarians, Emma grinned.

She then winced, and of course had to say something stupid before Lord Elrond whisked her over to the halls of healing for some hangover medicine.

" Do you mind turning the sun off while I'm here?"


	4. Chapter 3: It's Lunchtime!

Chapter 3:Lunchtime.

_A dissertation of the behaviour of Emma Neureutsos with a hangover and her twin sister getting revenge._

**Author's Note:**

**Dude, thankyall for the encouraging reviews and the feedback! Nice, nice people are followed who me story. ( Yoda grammar? Thank my brother the Star Wars nerd.)You dudes are all kind and constructive. I wish I could update more often; here is my absolutely awesome excuse:**

**Getting the flu? Not fun.**

**Getting the flu and studying at home for chemistry finals? Oh Hell no.**

**Getting the flu, studying at home for chemistry finals and practicing scales? Uenghhh.**

**Getting the flu, staying home to study, practicing piano till your fingers hurt and then when you FINALLY get a chance to go onto , throwing up all over your computer? AHHHHH KILL ME NOW!**

**Disclaimer:**

**France: Ohonhonhonhonhon!**

**Elladan and Elrohir : Oh HOLY CRAP! * Runs away from Cupcake* **

**Cupcake: I don't even know what just happened…**

As soon as Elladan and Elrohir had lead them to their shared suite ( bedroom, bathroom, reception room) , Emma collapsed on her bed and started snoring. The three remaining dark haired elves exchanged glances.

" Do elves snore?" The newly transformed elleth inquired.

"No." One of them replied, smirking.

" Well, actually, Lord Glorfindel does, but only to get on Erestor's nerves." The other ( later known to be Elladan) added as an afterthought.

They glanced at the snoring girl.

" Do you have any clue when she is going to wake up?" Asked Elladan, unconsciously steering the conversation in a completely different direction.

Emily snorted. "Judging by the contents of my case,and the potency of the alcohol, she should be out for about… 5 hours… she really must have been quite drunk to have such marvellous abilities."

" Abilities?"

" Oh, I don't know, perhaps her obvious skill in retaining the affects of alcohol AFTER having a hangover. Walking a circle in about 3 steps, after proclaiming: '_M'alright, sis*hiccup* I jusneeda siddown.*giggle*I thinkdwould be nice ifmmah hair was purple,yanow?'_ Is no easy feat."

Elrohir started choking, trying to supress his laughter while Elladan simply rolled his eyes.  
>"Why do you have that briefcase, Emily?" the twins asked, confusion etched on their fair faces.<p>

Reading the blatant looks of curiosity on both faces, she pulled out the content of her briefcase to be examined by the twins. After they had told her she could put it away again, although not exactly in the nicest way, ( " Why in Eru would you have that … thing in there?" " It's a battery powered laptop, ya douche." " What is a _douche_?" …) They talked for a while longer, on quite trivial matters, until she peered around the room, taking in the closet, the beds, and the form of her sleeping sister. Then she grinned. An evil grin it was. Turning to the brothers, who were still discussing why putting a snake in Erestor's was ,in hindsight, NOT a good idea, she snapped her fingers.

After drawing their attention, she asked, " After seeing my sister's INSANE attitude, who do you consider more mischievous? Me? Or her?"

They glanced at each other, and then replied in unison:

" You."

" It's like Erestor and Glorfindel…" Elladan started.

"Erestor is much sneakier, he just doesn't use his skills." Elrohir continued.

Emily smiled.

" What would you say if I told you Emma sleep talks?"

They all wore matching smirks now.

" We'd say…" Elrohir started.

" We need to see this." Elladan finished.

They all walked over to the curled up figure of Emma and Emily poked her once.

" Emma… It's time to wake up."  
>"No… we must stop the cat conquistadors…" she rolled over and curled back up.<p>

Elladan and Elrohir nearly died.

" Emma… wake u~up." Emily said in a singsong tone, smirking.

" Call Tim. Call him about the cheese. We must save the cheese!"

"What?" Even Emily was lost now, still grinning broadly.  
>" The ceiling is BLEEDING!" Emma thrashed around, throwing out an arm and accidentally slapping her sister in the face.<p>

They all lost it here, but Emma continued.

" Pew pew pew!"

"What on Arda are you doing?" Elrohir asked, making the strange sound of someone who is trying not to die.  
>" Isn't it obvious? I'm a whale!" She replied in a valley-girl voice.<p>

"There aren't any whales here, are there, Elrohir?" Elladan inquired.

" No, no, no no! If you squint, they find you in cereal."

"Who the hell are you?" Emily asked grinning.

"BOB MARLEY! BOB MARLEY! BOB MARLEY!"

Emily decided to go all the way. Emma was hanging on the edge of the bed now, so she gave her sister a poke and…

Crash.

"LUNCHTIME!"

Just as Glorfindel had entered the room to alert them that it was indeed, Lunchtime.

Everyone just about died of laughter, leaning on each other as they cracked up.

Emma woke up then, rubbed her head and inquired:

"What did I miss?"


End file.
